Getting through to limerent anoxic vs hypoxic brain injury spouses

Since I have not discussed my situation with my SO anoxic vs hypoxic brain injury (or much with anyone else) I have had to rely on splitting my thinking into anoxic vs hypoxic brain injury two perspectives. One is the limerent fantasy state, and the other is the hard facts of reality. When I have an interaction with LO I evaluate it anoxic vs hypoxic brain injury from both perspectives and force myself to focus on the anoxic vs hypoxic brain injury hard facts, which mostly means I don’t actually have any facts that prove anything solid about anoxic vs hypoxic brain injury my LO or his feelings for me. Then I add a third perspective, which is a list of all the reasons I know anoxic vs hypoxic brain injury that my SO loves me. One of the main things that I tell myself is anoxic vs hypoxic brain injury that my LO is not aware of a single significant anoxic vs hypoxic brain injury event that has happened to me since I have met anoxic vs hypoxic brain injury him. He basically knows nothing about me, and I can’t be sure of what I have evaluated about him. I constantly remind myself that his character is a figment anoxic vs hypoxic brain injury of my imagination and I also recreate myself to be anoxic vs hypoxic brain injury someone else while limerent so neither one of us is anoxic vs hypoxic brain injury an accurate portrayal of who we really are.

I want to emphasize that my SO has been the anoxic vs hypoxic brain injury one to put up with my attitude through the rough anoxic vs hypoxic brain injury stages of the last year and his tolerance is proof anoxic vs hypoxic brain injury that he is the real lover in my life even anoxic vs hypoxic brain injury if he doesn’t provide all the fantasy thrills and we bicker. When I ask myself what his motivations are in doing anoxic vs hypoxic brain injury things that may initially annoy me I realize his methods anoxic vs hypoxic brain injury may seem insensitive but what he wants is for me anoxic vs hypoxic brain injury to feel confident, be content, be happy etc. It is not productive to make the SO the villain anoxic vs hypoxic brain injury for the convenience of living a false reality and being anoxic vs hypoxic brain injury tortured by a seriously questionable future with an LO.

You are right! Escapism was what put me into this particular situation, and fortunately I realized that fairly early with this LE. I have had other limerent experiences where the motivation was anoxic vs hypoxic brain injury seeking a better relationship and I evaluated whether this time anoxic vs hypoxic brain injury was the same, but I came to the conclusion that my relationship with anoxic vs hypoxic brain injury my SO had truly changed for the better six years anoxic vs hypoxic brain injury ago. I guess maybe that was the craziest part. I was risking ruining something good because someone else MIGHT anoxic vs hypoxic brain injury find me attractive (mid-life crisis) and I wanted the attention. The part I have the hardest time dealing with is anoxic vs hypoxic brain injury that I am a logical, reasonable, responsible person with a conscience and when limerent I have anoxic vs hypoxic brain injury this other side that rationalizes things that should not be anoxic vs hypoxic brain injury rationalized. It is like there is a dual life going on anoxic vs hypoxic brain injury even when there isn’t anything going on with the LO. I described it as a mild case because of the anoxic vs hypoxic brain injury minuscule contact that I have with the LO compared to anoxic vs hypoxic brain injury people who actually have some sort of relationship with their anoxic vs hypoxic brain injury LO or have a significant amount of contact. I count it as a blessing that I have never anoxic vs hypoxic brain injury had the opportunity to deepen this “bond” that I tell myself that I sense. But I was pretty far gone mentally and was wondering anoxic vs hypoxic brain injury if I would have to go into therapy. Then I found this site and felt I had found anoxic vs hypoxic brain injury my tribe of co-crazies! What a relief! Another thing that helped me was when my LO seemed anoxic vs hypoxic brain injury to be flirting with me (a lot of eye contact) I realized I had no idea what his intentions were, what he expected, whether he was on an ego trip, or if he was crazy, and it really scared me when I realized someone else anoxic vs hypoxic brain injury could witness these exchanges between us and start rumors that anoxic vs hypoxic brain injury my SO would hear. I did not want to put my SO through that anoxic vs hypoxic brain injury doubt.

I never fully disclosed to SO because every time I anoxic vs hypoxic brain injury thought “how do I explain these unusually powerful and unique feelings anoxic vs hypoxic brain injury to SO”, I had no idea where that conversation would lead. Though a couple of weeks into limerence, I ABSOLUTELY HAD TO address what was happening to me. I was almost completely non-functional, uncontrollable crying at times. I told my wife that I was upset that LO anoxic vs hypoxic brain injury would be leaving work, but more along the lines of the circumstances of how anoxic vs hypoxic brain injury she was leaving (there was some truth to this). I know this puzzled my wife to some extent. In hindsight, this was the time where (full) disclosure could have happened, but because I had all of these unfamiliar, very personal emotions, I was scared to death. How could this come out and not have it look anoxic vs hypoxic brain injury like I was in love with someone else? Was I?

Had I understood limerence at the time, I would have been much better armed with some clue anoxic vs hypoxic brain injury as to what was happening to me. But I felt embarrassed and completely vulnerable, and honestly, I might have ultimately still tried to attack limerence in anoxic vs hypoxic brain injury isolation. As more time passed, and I fell deeper into limerence, I felt I moved further and further away from the anoxic vs hypoxic brain injury possibility of disclosure. My normally logical self was somewhere else. I feel fortunate to be where I am now, 2 years later, still limerent (though much less so), but quite aware.

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